Wednesday, June 24, 2009

The Gossip - Heavy Cross

Have I mentioned that I'm in love with Beth Ditto and The Gossip? There are 6 million reasons why and here are two of them, in no order of significance:

1. Beth Ditto is hot, fat, rock & roll, and unapologetic. As a plus-sized girl, I often get irritated and ranty when it comes to fat & fashion, fat & beauty, fat & role-models, fat & fat-hate and fat & pretty much everything else in pop culture. I try to spare everyone from my long-winded rants with much success but I'm going to step out of that to say: Beth Ditto is hot AND fat AND awesome and it's about time that someone this wicked is finally breaking some molds.

2. When it comes to being fashionable (an extreme challenge for meaty ladies as we have limited options) Beth Ditto rocks that shit out, wearing whatever she feels like and looking hot. Did I mention she's hot?

Check out the new single from The Gossip, "Heavy Cross". Dripping in gold jewellery and spitting gold dust, this chick is after my heart. I've already concluded that this album is going to be one summer anthem after another and it'll be a new livingroom dance party fave.

Happy Pride Week everyone!

xoxo Amarina

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

Bump Bu Bump Bu Bump It Up

OKAY. I absolutely love infomercials. LOVE them. The Shopping Network is a close second to the late night 30 minute spots but I'll settle if I have to. Especially when you get to witness episodes featuring a drunk Brian Bailey hocking his Spring/Summer 2009 collection and making comments like "you'll look good coming and going" while smacking asses, throwing empty hangers around the set and talking over the poor dude who is attempting to sell his product (genius). This one-time live episodic structure of the Shopping Network is precisely why I prefer the late night paid advertisements that you see over and over again.

My affair with the late night infomercials began with the "Set It and Forget It" rotisserie grill that would be absolutely useless to a vegetarian such as myself, yet I still wanted it. The talking head of the doctor in his office features him outlining the benefits of the machine while a pair of fowl rotate and drip in the background. IN HIS OFFICE.

Next came the Magic Bullet, which sounds more like a vibrator I'd like to have and less like a piece of kitchen equipment that I can't possibly live without. The smoking hag gave the hosts a run for their money in the acting department and I was hooked.

This was followed by a brief fascination with that self-sustaining vacuum that is capable of making decisions and maybe has a soul. I have now concluded that I'm scared of it and try not to think about the advancement of machines.

I'm not even going to get into the Vince of ShamWow meth-fueled prostitute-ridden drama because it's too out there and I could really go on about it. I will say that his new "Slap Chop/Graty" show is pretty impressive, regardless of a million products out there exactly like it.

Now we get to the Bump It, which I have been enjoying for the last couple of months. I know the video is 8 mins long, but please if you're going to watch any of it, watch up to the 3 minute mark. After professions of "no teasing!", "no hairspray", and something like "no more hair disintegration", the woman is actually unable to create the look without these things. The resulting coif was described by my boyfriend as a lop-sided wedding cake. Instant classic, enjoy!


Monday, June 15, 2009

Toronto Air Sex Championships

Oh man, so excited that it's finally consistently lovely outside and my partner and I feel like we've broken the hermit cocoon and are venturing out into the world again. One of the things I'd been looking forward to for awhile is the Air Sex Championships that rolled through Toronto last night. A perfect mix of sexy slow jams from the 70's - 90's (hello Color Me Badd!!) and epic film instrumentals (maybe a ditty from Harry Potter?), the brave souls that ventured on stage wiggled and moaned and stripped and were generally sweaty and hilarious.

I like to think it takes a lot to shock me, but I was genuinely surprised to see the very first contestant light his prop dink on fire. This must be the ultimate sign predicting one hell of a summer and I'm so ready for it.


Thursday, June 11, 2009

Luminato & What the hell happened to June?

Ooooh tonight me and the buds are checking out one of the free Luminato events. It's a screening of the silent horror film Tales of the Uncanny (Unheimliche Geschichten) that was first released in 1919. The soundtrack will be provided live by none other than Final Fantasy, Do Make Say Think and Berlin electronica artist Robert Lippok. Should be AWESOME!

xoxo Amarina

P.S. How the hell is it June 11th already? Where have I been?